Welcome to "Seeker's Sojourn," a blog that contains
both old and new essays of mine. Not all, but most
involve my interest in Science and Spirituality.
They go back a few years, pretty much reflecting
my experience as well.
It would probably be better to go back to the first
post, which is an Introduction, then work your way
forward--following the numerical sequence. This
approach allows for probably a more natural flow of
my thought.
Tuesday, October 18, 2011
Monday, October 17, 2011
(50) Extraterrestrial Life
Years back, a few years before I retired from the Government, I
met a scientist connected with the Mutual UFO Network--known
as MUFON. At the time I was a member of the Washington
Evolutionary Systems Society, a group mainly composed of
local scientists interested in the subject of Evolutionary Systems.
Attending their meetings, I met this gentleman. We got to talking
about UFOs, and I made mention my interest. He felt that perhaps
after my retirement I might consider volunteering as a MUFON
interviewer for the Northern Virginia group.
Anyway, I looked into this and discovered that there were lots
of UFO sightings in this part of the world--where I lived at the
time. The trouble was that I had one bad ear, and my other
so-called good ear was beginning to fade. So I wasn't sure that
I would make a good interviewer when it came to talking and
taping conversations with people who reported UFO sightings.
On top of this, I was a little bit scared. Didn't know why I felt
this way, but at the time I was.
On the other hand at the time (around 1990) I kept up with UFO
literature that I found by digging-up news reports, books in the
library, etc. But what caught my eye was that the Government
Repository located in nearby Maryland was planning to make
available collected UFO data due to the recently instituted
"Freedom of Information Act" by Congress. I thought to myself
that by golly I might like doing research into some of this
stuff after I retired, might even find something interesting
that I could write about.
The trouble was that I had already started the "ball rolling" on
another track when it came to what I might do after I retired--
Science and Spirituality.
I had already enrolled in a postgraduate program at Georgetown
University. So I put aside any "far fetched" ideas I might have
had about UFO research. And these past twenty or so years I have
been busily engaged in the field of Science and Spirituality,
following my professional education in such by writing essays
and stories that I have placed aboard the WEB.
Lately I've extended into a "Future Focus" essay site, working
into cutting-edge scientifically oriented theological-philosophical
theoretics that can be projected into the future of Science and
Spirituality. After this site is completed, I think I'll work
into the idea of Extraterrestrial Life, with all the accessories
such as Panspermia, Directed Panspermia, UFO phenomena (ancient and
modern), crop circles (as perhaps a means of communication) and
abduction accounts. Even if this phenomena is only borderline credible,
it's fascinating--holding import for the Present as well as the Future.
[Part of this post is derived from one of Facebook Notes, entitled
"MUFON: Almost Once," published in August 2011.]
met a scientist connected with the Mutual UFO Network--known
as MUFON. At the time I was a member of the Washington
Evolutionary Systems Society, a group mainly composed of
local scientists interested in the subject of Evolutionary Systems.
Attending their meetings, I met this gentleman. We got to talking
about UFOs, and I made mention my interest. He felt that perhaps
after my retirement I might consider volunteering as a MUFON
interviewer for the Northern Virginia group.
Anyway, I looked into this and discovered that there were lots
of UFO sightings in this part of the world--where I lived at the
time. The trouble was that I had one bad ear, and my other
so-called good ear was beginning to fade. So I wasn't sure that
I would make a good interviewer when it came to talking and
taping conversations with people who reported UFO sightings.
On top of this, I was a little bit scared. Didn't know why I felt
this way, but at the time I was.
On the other hand at the time (around 1990) I kept up with UFO
literature that I found by digging-up news reports, books in the
library, etc. But what caught my eye was that the Government
Repository located in nearby Maryland was planning to make
available collected UFO data due to the recently instituted
"Freedom of Information Act" by Congress. I thought to myself
that by golly I might like doing research into some of this
stuff after I retired, might even find something interesting
that I could write about.
The trouble was that I had already started the "ball rolling" on
another track when it came to what I might do after I retired--
Science and Spirituality.
I had already enrolled in a postgraduate program at Georgetown
University. So I put aside any "far fetched" ideas I might have
had about UFO research. And these past twenty or so years I have
been busily engaged in the field of Science and Spirituality,
following my professional education in such by writing essays
and stories that I have placed aboard the WEB.
Lately I've extended into a "Future Focus" essay site, working
into cutting-edge scientifically oriented theological-philosophical
theoretics that can be projected into the future of Science and
Spirituality. After this site is completed, I think I'll work
into the idea of Extraterrestrial Life, with all the accessories
such as Panspermia, Directed Panspermia, UFO phenomena (ancient and
modern), crop circles (as perhaps a means of communication) and
abduction accounts. Even if this phenomena is only borderline credible,
it's fascinating--holding import for the Present as well as the Future.
[Part of this post is derived from one of Facebook Notes, entitled
"MUFON: Almost Once," published in August 2011.]
Friday, October 14, 2011
(49) Full Circle
The other day I was surprised, in that Google was advertising "my"
E-Book, available for sale on Google or Amazon. I didn't even know
that I had an E-Book. As it turned out, it's a thesis I wrote at
Georgetown back in 1990--and the university was listed as the
publisher. I'm thinking that perhaps universities are sifting through
old theses, deciding to sell some on the E-market.
Anyway, I dusted off my old thesis in order to find anything that might
be embarrassing after 21 years since writing it. Fortunately, nope!
What interested me was that what I said in this thesis--"The Play of
the Cosmic Process: A Synthesis of Teilhard's Cosmogenesis and
Bohm's Theory of the Implicate Order"--pretty much described my
bent of thinking over the long period since I wrote it.
It's *cosmic* oriented, and recently I listed myself on Facebook as
being prone towards "Cosmic Theism." Just about all my essays
and stories I've written--since probably 1998--are pretty much
cosmically oriented. Basically, whether its the Perennial Philosophy,
the Logos-Pneuma, or the Pantocrator coupled with the Holy Spirit,
these approaches are all speaking of the same thing, just trying
to explain the Mystery that stands behind the universe and all of
existence.
So I have come "full circle," not really much deviating from my days
back during my studies at Georgetown. The thesis is also a study
in modeling, a systems philosophy approach, evolving a second
tier model out of first tier models--in this case those of Teilhard de
Chardin and David Bohm.
Interestingly, though coming from different milieux as well as
different perspectives, Teilhard and Bohm theoretically declare
that there's a "Within" to our universe, or an "Inner Lining" to our
outer universe. Bohm was one of the leading quantum physicists
of the 20th century and Teilhard--a Jesuit--was a well respected
geologist and paleontologist during the forepart of the 20th century,
They both also believe that the "Within" or Bohm's "Holomovement"
are intimately connected with our explicate or outer universe. This
connection is like a feedback cycle, in that *Information* is enfolded
in the Within, but such is thrust out into the Explicate Order, where
through insight, intuition, greater levels of consciousness, we
sentient beings might pick-up this Information and make something
out of it. And as we evolve, building-up via research, new approaches,
developing a Noosphere, our learning and accomplishments are
fed back to the "Within," which somehow is evolving as well.
Unfortunately, as both Teilhard and Bohm attest, we humans are
a long way off when it comes to grasping this "connection." But it's
there, always present, waiting, hopefully not being ignored or
wasted. Of course the universe is a rather large place, so Sentience
is surely everywhere, coming eventually to terms with this special
connection. And those who are at the cusp of such connection,
and can't somehow connect because of *Ignorance* or refusal,
Evolution has a propensity to replace such with ever rising new
species that reflect Sentience.
At least I am glad, coming to realize that I have come Full Circle
over the years. I'll just keep plugging along.
E-Book, available for sale on Google or Amazon. I didn't even know
that I had an E-Book. As it turned out, it's a thesis I wrote at
Georgetown back in 1990--and the university was listed as the
publisher. I'm thinking that perhaps universities are sifting through
old theses, deciding to sell some on the E-market.
Anyway, I dusted off my old thesis in order to find anything that might
be embarrassing after 21 years since writing it. Fortunately, nope!
What interested me was that what I said in this thesis--"The Play of
the Cosmic Process: A Synthesis of Teilhard's Cosmogenesis and
Bohm's Theory of the Implicate Order"--pretty much described my
bent of thinking over the long period since I wrote it.
It's *cosmic* oriented, and recently I listed myself on Facebook as
being prone towards "Cosmic Theism." Just about all my essays
and stories I've written--since probably 1998--are pretty much
cosmically oriented. Basically, whether its the Perennial Philosophy,
the Logos-Pneuma, or the Pantocrator coupled with the Holy Spirit,
these approaches are all speaking of the same thing, just trying
to explain the Mystery that stands behind the universe and all of
existence.
So I have come "full circle," not really much deviating from my days
back during my studies at Georgetown. The thesis is also a study
in modeling, a systems philosophy approach, evolving a second
tier model out of first tier models--in this case those of Teilhard de
Chardin and David Bohm.
Interestingly, though coming from different milieux as well as
different perspectives, Teilhard and Bohm theoretically declare
that there's a "Within" to our universe, or an "Inner Lining" to our
outer universe. Bohm was one of the leading quantum physicists
of the 20th century and Teilhard--a Jesuit--was a well respected
geologist and paleontologist during the forepart of the 20th century,
They both also believe that the "Within" or Bohm's "Holomovement"
are intimately connected with our explicate or outer universe. This
connection is like a feedback cycle, in that *Information* is enfolded
in the Within, but such is thrust out into the Explicate Order, where
through insight, intuition, greater levels of consciousness, we
sentient beings might pick-up this Information and make something
out of it. And as we evolve, building-up via research, new approaches,
developing a Noosphere, our learning and accomplishments are
fed back to the "Within," which somehow is evolving as well.
Unfortunately, as both Teilhard and Bohm attest, we humans are
a long way off when it comes to grasping this "connection." But it's
there, always present, waiting, hopefully not being ignored or
wasted. Of course the universe is a rather large place, so Sentience
is surely everywhere, coming eventually to terms with this special
connection. And those who are at the cusp of such connection,
and can't somehow connect because of *Ignorance* or refusal,
Evolution has a propensity to replace such with ever rising new
species that reflect Sentience.
At least I am glad, coming to realize that I have come Full Circle
over the years. I'll just keep plugging along.
Monday, July 18, 2011
(48) Creation as Scripture
Recently I had a conversation with a friend, and our
discussion turned to the topic of Scripture. Being a devotee
of Science and Spirituality, I made mention the oft heard
"Book of Nature" vis-a-vis the "Book of Scripture." One would
seem based on observation, and the other based on revelation.
There has also been a tendency to choose one over the other.
While my friend and I were talking about these two kinds of
Books, if you will, I suddenly said that I felt that Creation was
truly Scripture writ by the Creator. I kind of surprised myself,
because this statement literally jumped out before I even began
to think about it.
Later I started wondering about this slip of my mind. As I have
oft considered, Scripture we possess and declare has been
written by human hand. And it is moot as to whether the authors
were "divinely inspired." Perhaps it is easier to assume we
might know by the fruits brought forth by written Scripture. As
any serious student of History, much less Religion, can tell you--
our written Scripture is a mixed miscellany that can be judged
in both positive and negative ways. We humans have had the
tendency to use Scripture in wrongful ways, for our own
purposes--especially when it comes to Power and Authority.
Turning to the Book of Nature, or Creation as Scripture, I began
to wonder if perhaps we had a kind of fool-proof "book" writ by
the Creator. It's definitely a certainty that we humans had no
hand creating the universe, at least initially. However, now our
Science and Technology has reached the point where we are at the
edge of creating what once was presumed only possible via Nature's
work. Of course humans are part and parcel of Nature, though
sometimes we forget this little fact. Thus maybe it is not so
outlandish to think that via our own creativity we are contributing
to the Book of Nature.
Nonetheless, there are pitfalls in this--just as when the Book of
Scripture was writ by human hands. We *interpret* the Deity,
the Divine, and usually follow with pronouncements. Alas, from
what I can tell, we tend toward the same habits when it comes to
the Book of Nature.
Still there's lots to learn from these two great Books--of Scripture,
of Nature. It's just that we need look with not only our heart but
with our mind, in a more honest way--rather than as a matter of
expediency.
I think, too, that we can blend these two Books, somehow
integrating the pearls of Wisdom found in the Book of Scripture
with the discoveries of Profundity we find in the Book of Nature.
Then we might eventually glean a great message.
discussion turned to the topic of Scripture. Being a devotee
of Science and Spirituality, I made mention the oft heard
"Book of Nature" vis-a-vis the "Book of Scripture." One would
seem based on observation, and the other based on revelation.
There has also been a tendency to choose one over the other.
While my friend and I were talking about these two kinds of
Books, if you will, I suddenly said that I felt that Creation was
truly Scripture writ by the Creator. I kind of surprised myself,
because this statement literally jumped out before I even began
to think about it.
Later I started wondering about this slip of my mind. As I have
oft considered, Scripture we possess and declare has been
written by human hand. And it is moot as to whether the authors
were "divinely inspired." Perhaps it is easier to assume we
might know by the fruits brought forth by written Scripture. As
any serious student of History, much less Religion, can tell you--
our written Scripture is a mixed miscellany that can be judged
in both positive and negative ways. We humans have had the
tendency to use Scripture in wrongful ways, for our own
purposes--especially when it comes to Power and Authority.
Turning to the Book of Nature, or Creation as Scripture, I began
to wonder if perhaps we had a kind of fool-proof "book" writ by
the Creator. It's definitely a certainty that we humans had no
hand creating the universe, at least initially. However, now our
Science and Technology has reached the point where we are at the
edge of creating what once was presumed only possible via Nature's
work. Of course humans are part and parcel of Nature, though
sometimes we forget this little fact. Thus maybe it is not so
outlandish to think that via our own creativity we are contributing
to the Book of Nature.
Nonetheless, there are pitfalls in this--just as when the Book of
Scripture was writ by human hands. We *interpret* the Deity,
the Divine, and usually follow with pronouncements. Alas, from
what I can tell, we tend toward the same habits when it comes to
the Book of Nature.
Still there's lots to learn from these two great Books--of Scripture,
of Nature. It's just that we need look with not only our heart but
with our mind, in a more honest way--rather than as a matter of
expediency.
I think, too, that we can blend these two Books, somehow
integrating the pearls of Wisdom found in the Book of Scripture
with the discoveries of Profundity we find in the Book of Nature.
Then we might eventually glean a great message.
Sunday, June 12, 2011
(47) Scripture
Awhile back I was e-talking with a friend about Scripture. Over
the millennia there have been all forms of human-generated
Scripture, eventually transformed by some as writ by God's own
hand. Hence we have "Holy Writ," if you will.
As for myself, even when a youngster, I had questions about
Biblical Scripture. I still remember people pointing fingers,
threatening, quoting Scripture in the most extreme ways. So--
since I had begun to read pretty good, I decided to pull out a
family Bible and started checking it out for myself.
Right off I began to see disparities, mistakes in the telling,
and this shook me at my young age. Later, after years of not
only self-study, but also professional study, I'm no longer
surprised or shook. The Bible is a library of books about a
myriad of topics, ranging from an usually heroic (if not precisely
a historically correct) account of Ancient Israel and its People.
Moving from the Old to the New Testament, one can detect
the effort of the various authors to carry forth a continuity of
those earlier writings that proclaimed the coming of a Messiah.
Hence writers in the New Testament proclaimed Jesus the
Messiah, the Son of God. And the Gospel writers also catered
to the particular faith group to which the belonged. Also, the
Gospels were written 70-to-90 years after the death of Jesus.
Just check any Bible and look at the special notes, and this
chronology is mentioned.
So it's difficult to think of these Gospel writers as those original
disciples, some likely near illiterate fishermen who spoke
colloquial Aramaic rather than the Greek which was the
original language employed when it came to these writings.
Studying further, I found out that biblical scholars believe that
the Gospel writers initially may have formed their stories around
an earlier account called the "Q" document, though no such
document has ever been discovered. However, surely there
must have been an oral tradition of sorts,
I discovered, too, that there probably was more than one author
of some of these Gospels. Computer technology has played a
part when it comes to this assumption. Goodness! Even recently
I came across a noted scholar talking about the "Deutero Paul."
That surprised me, especially since St. Paul's writing preceded
the Gospels.
Nonetheless, I do realize that there's some "historicity" in these
scriptural accounts. It's just not History as we have come to
understand such today, which is documented and presumed
factual. What scholars have been discovering is that these
Gospels were narratives, stories smack full of not only events
but symbolism. And they definitely tell one of the Greatest
Stories of all time!
Now does all this make the Scriptures untenable? For some,
maybe. For others, not at all. They are a record presented by
ancient voices, oft in a style familiar to the archaic societies in
which they lived. What has become important for me, as I have
continued to be fascinated by Scripture, is to study deeper into
these archaic societies to which the Gospel writers were addressing.
If we can better understand the thought patterns, the nuances of
these archaic societies, then Scripture might fall into place far
better when it comes to our understanding of such.
the millennia there have been all forms of human-generated
Scripture, eventually transformed by some as writ by God's own
hand. Hence we have "Holy Writ," if you will.
As for myself, even when a youngster, I had questions about
Biblical Scripture. I still remember people pointing fingers,
threatening, quoting Scripture in the most extreme ways. So--
since I had begun to read pretty good, I decided to pull out a
family Bible and started checking it out for myself.
Right off I began to see disparities, mistakes in the telling,
and this shook me at my young age. Later, after years of not
only self-study, but also professional study, I'm no longer
surprised or shook. The Bible is a library of books about a
myriad of topics, ranging from an usually heroic (if not precisely
a historically correct) account of Ancient Israel and its People.
Moving from the Old to the New Testament, one can detect
the effort of the various authors to carry forth a continuity of
those earlier writings that proclaimed the coming of a Messiah.
Hence writers in the New Testament proclaimed Jesus the
Messiah, the Son of God. And the Gospel writers also catered
to the particular faith group to which the belonged. Also, the
Gospels were written 70-to-90 years after the death of Jesus.
Just check any Bible and look at the special notes, and this
chronology is mentioned.
So it's difficult to think of these Gospel writers as those original
disciples, some likely near illiterate fishermen who spoke
colloquial Aramaic rather than the Greek which was the
original language employed when it came to these writings.
Studying further, I found out that biblical scholars believe that
the Gospel writers initially may have formed their stories around
an earlier account called the "Q" document, though no such
document has ever been discovered. However, surely there
must have been an oral tradition of sorts,
I discovered, too, that there probably was more than one author
of some of these Gospels. Computer technology has played a
part when it comes to this assumption. Goodness! Even recently
I came across a noted scholar talking about the "Deutero Paul."
That surprised me, especially since St. Paul's writing preceded
the Gospels.
Nonetheless, I do realize that there's some "historicity" in these
scriptural accounts. It's just not History as we have come to
understand such today, which is documented and presumed
factual. What scholars have been discovering is that these
Gospels were narratives, stories smack full of not only events
but symbolism. And they definitely tell one of the Greatest
Stories of all time!
Now does all this make the Scriptures untenable? For some,
maybe. For others, not at all. They are a record presented by
ancient voices, oft in a style familiar to the archaic societies in
which they lived. What has become important for me, as I have
continued to be fascinated by Scripture, is to study deeper into
these archaic societies to which the Gospel writers were addressing.
If we can better understand the thought patterns, the nuances of
these archaic societies, then Scripture might fall into place far
better when it comes to our understanding of such.
(46) Cosmic Vision
People through the ages have visions, some come through
meditation, some through dreams, but always unexpectedly.
My special vision came in a dream, a seriously profound dream!
Years back I spent a lot of time working into the Benedictine
Tradition, a monastic-oriented life. (See my "Monastic Muse"
journal, if interested.) Anyway--I was having concerns that
my Benedictine moorings were drifting away, hence I was
disturbed. Perhaps because of this disturbed state I had
this special dream or vision.
In the dream I was sitting in the abbey, listening to a conference
given by the abbot. During the course of his talk, I started noticing
him slipping farther and farther away. Suddenly I looked up and
saw the roof of the abbey had become a gigantic skylight. It
opened to the night sky, and a friend sitting next to me said "look."
Looking upward, I saw countless stars in the night sky--and directly
overhead was the Big Dipper, turned upside down. It was
pouring stars down onto my head. And out of the corner of my eye
I saw a great shining City of Light in the distance, out in Space.
Astounded, I realized that I had received a cosmic baptism!
Now there are different ways to interpret such a dream or vision.
One is to ignore it completely, but I couldn't. Another is to set it
within the context of my own small reality, and probably whittle it
away. But I couldn't. Somehow, down to my basic instinct, I felt
this dream or vision as seriously significant for me.
Years before, in New Mexico, I had discovered my "wotai stone,"
which I described in Item 21 of this essay site. I had worked into
the indigenous spirituality of Ed McGaa, a Sioux spiritual master,
and he talked about the Great Spirit, Wakan Tanka, and also about
the wotai stone, millions of years in the making, made just for you.
And, yes, I found mine!
Within this special stone one could see a rainbow-streaked eagle
looming over a globe, seemingly protecting it. The eagle is a spirit
bird, flying higher than all the other birds, reaching into the heavens.
It's symbolic of the Great Spirit. As for the globe, I interpreted this
symbol two ways: one as the planet Earth, the other as the universe.
Later I came upon a special ring, which I wear to this day. It drew
me towards it when I first saw it. Within the stone there's a massive
comet streaking across the starry sky. I see it as the Fire of the
Spirit traversing through the Cosmos.
So, with this special dream vision I finally realized that all my past
concentration into understanding the universe, trying to approach
the Contours of God through my efforts in Science and Spirituality,
my fascination with the Pantocrator, the Lord of the Universe,
Master of the Cosmic Realm, even my volunteer efforts as a
docent naturalist, concentrating on eco-literacy, focusing on the
natural systems of the planet, all were somehow *connected.*
Consequently, this special dream-vision of a cosmic baptism
seemed a verification for me that my long sojourn, into all its
paths, was right for me. I had over time received strong hints
all along the way that this special sojourn reflected the right
calling for me. And the dream-vision seemed the final stamp
of approval, if you will.
I accept such, and with this shall continue my efforts as long as
I have breath.
meditation, some through dreams, but always unexpectedly.
My special vision came in a dream, a seriously profound dream!
Years back I spent a lot of time working into the Benedictine
Tradition, a monastic-oriented life. (See my "Monastic Muse"
journal, if interested.) Anyway--I was having concerns that
my Benedictine moorings were drifting away, hence I was
disturbed. Perhaps because of this disturbed state I had
this special dream or vision.
In the dream I was sitting in the abbey, listening to a conference
given by the abbot. During the course of his talk, I started noticing
him slipping farther and farther away. Suddenly I looked up and
saw the roof of the abbey had become a gigantic skylight. It
opened to the night sky, and a friend sitting next to me said "look."
Looking upward, I saw countless stars in the night sky--and directly
overhead was the Big Dipper, turned upside down. It was
pouring stars down onto my head. And out of the corner of my eye
I saw a great shining City of Light in the distance, out in Space.
Astounded, I realized that I had received a cosmic baptism!
Now there are different ways to interpret such a dream or vision.
One is to ignore it completely, but I couldn't. Another is to set it
within the context of my own small reality, and probably whittle it
away. But I couldn't. Somehow, down to my basic instinct, I felt
this dream or vision as seriously significant for me.
Years before, in New Mexico, I had discovered my "wotai stone,"
which I described in Item 21 of this essay site. I had worked into
the indigenous spirituality of Ed McGaa, a Sioux spiritual master,
and he talked about the Great Spirit, Wakan Tanka, and also about
the wotai stone, millions of years in the making, made just for you.
And, yes, I found mine!
Within this special stone one could see a rainbow-streaked eagle
looming over a globe, seemingly protecting it. The eagle is a spirit
bird, flying higher than all the other birds, reaching into the heavens.
It's symbolic of the Great Spirit. As for the globe, I interpreted this
symbol two ways: one as the planet Earth, the other as the universe.
Later I came upon a special ring, which I wear to this day. It drew
me towards it when I first saw it. Within the stone there's a massive
comet streaking across the starry sky. I see it as the Fire of the
Spirit traversing through the Cosmos.
So, with this special dream vision I finally realized that all my past
concentration into understanding the universe, trying to approach
the Contours of God through my efforts in Science and Spirituality,
my fascination with the Pantocrator, the Lord of the Universe,
Master of the Cosmic Realm, even my volunteer efforts as a
docent naturalist, concentrating on eco-literacy, focusing on the
natural systems of the planet, all were somehow *connected.*
Consequently, this special dream-vision of a cosmic baptism
seemed a verification for me that my long sojourn, into all its
paths, was right for me. I had over time received strong hints
all along the way that this special sojourn reflected the right
calling for me. And the dream-vision seemed the final stamp
of approval, if you will.
I accept such, and with this shall continue my efforts as long as
I have breath.
Friday, June 10, 2011
(45) Looking Back
It's like I am in an in-between time, neither this, neither that. I can't
say that I am comfortable in this state, but I do try to keep plugging
forward. Forward to what? It's like I am leaving something behind
and I have to go back and find it. So, before heading forward maybe
I need look back.
What might be back there to re-discover or maybe actually discover.
Events, experiences, happen in our life that sometimes just pass over
us, making hardly a ripple, barely noticeable, and later emerge into
significance. I seem to intuit that this might be the case for me.
On the other hand, I really do dislike looking back. I've never cared
to be Past oriented, if you will. But I seem to be getting an inner
message that now is the time to go against the grain and look back.
Whatever might I see or at least sense? I've walked down many
paths over my years, crossed bridges multiple times, keeping my
eyes fixed in the distance. So changing my gaze back, I need
look far in the distance the places I have traversed. What's there?
Maybe I have to employ my "feeling" more. I know what I miss, what
I sometimes long for. I miss those magical moments that I have
abandoned. My cool head, my scientific bent has held me in good
stead; however, so have my feelings. In the past they always worked
well together, but I have to wonder whether I have grown too one-
sided? Or too old?
I remember those magical moments in Nature, where I have walked
through glorious realms of mountains and canyons, looking out on
the distances of grasslands, cupping rainbows in my hands, watching
thunderous dark clouds closing overhead, watching wild animals
burrowing in the desert, transfixed by the Giant Sequoia, and simply
looking up at the clouds.
Too old for all this now? I hope not, but I feel more limited. Still I can
reach the ocean, sometimes go to the desert, and travel through the
mountains. I live in an area where all this is actually possible in a
day's time. So why not bring my Past back into my Present. It's just
a matter of intention--and a small amount of effort.
What else might I re-discover? It's the ever New that held me in
thrall when I first encountered the excitement of modern Science
Theories. I've let them become "hard work" now, and that's no
fun. I need regain my enthusiasm, that sense of *en theos* that
these new theoretics were unfolding for me.
Whew! This little exercise looking back actually energized me!
Perhaps such might help me get back on track. But it's all up to
me, bringing "back then" once again into my horizon as I move
forward.
say that I am comfortable in this state, but I do try to keep plugging
forward. Forward to what? It's like I am leaving something behind
and I have to go back and find it. So, before heading forward maybe
I need look back.
What might be back there to re-discover or maybe actually discover.
Events, experiences, happen in our life that sometimes just pass over
us, making hardly a ripple, barely noticeable, and later emerge into
significance. I seem to intuit that this might be the case for me.
On the other hand, I really do dislike looking back. I've never cared
to be Past oriented, if you will. But I seem to be getting an inner
message that now is the time to go against the grain and look back.
Whatever might I see or at least sense? I've walked down many
paths over my years, crossed bridges multiple times, keeping my
eyes fixed in the distance. So changing my gaze back, I need
look far in the distance the places I have traversed. What's there?
Maybe I have to employ my "feeling" more. I know what I miss, what
I sometimes long for. I miss those magical moments that I have
abandoned. My cool head, my scientific bent has held me in good
stead; however, so have my feelings. In the past they always worked
well together, but I have to wonder whether I have grown too one-
sided? Or too old?
I remember those magical moments in Nature, where I have walked
through glorious realms of mountains and canyons, looking out on
the distances of grasslands, cupping rainbows in my hands, watching
thunderous dark clouds closing overhead, watching wild animals
burrowing in the desert, transfixed by the Giant Sequoia, and simply
looking up at the clouds.
Too old for all this now? I hope not, but I feel more limited. Still I can
reach the ocean, sometimes go to the desert, and travel through the
mountains. I live in an area where all this is actually possible in a
day's time. So why not bring my Past back into my Present. It's just
a matter of intention--and a small amount of effort.
What else might I re-discover? It's the ever New that held me in
thrall when I first encountered the excitement of modern Science
Theories. I've let them become "hard work" now, and that's no
fun. I need regain my enthusiasm, that sense of *en theos* that
these new theoretics were unfolding for me.
Whew! This little exercise looking back actually energized me!
Perhaps such might help me get back on track. But it's all up to
me, bringing "back then" once again into my horizon as I move
forward.
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